So... my mobile has decided it'd be fun to turn itself off mid activity (phone all, text... it just dies). So that's fun. I'm on the phone to 02 atm hoping that it doesn't cut out.
Life's been pretty werid lately. My boyfriend and I broke up, after 4 years. I did it. I felt like I wasn't in love with him any more. I don't know though. All my friends are telling me that if I was still in love with him then I wouldn't have broken up with him. Which is kinda true, we did have problems, but now I'm wondering if that isn't fixible. I don't know. All I know is I love him so completely and I hate not being with him.
I'm seeing a counsellor on Tuesday, which I hope will help me to get my head straight, and figure out what it is that I want. If I do want to get back with him then I have a few more issues to resolve first. I'm moving to Australia soon (Sept or Jan, dunno which yet) so I have limited time to do it all in.
I spoke to his (effective) step mum and she was very nice and think that I've done the right thing and realises that although he doesn't realise it, I am trying to do what's best for the both of us. She's doing her best to help him and his dad's there for him too, although I know he feels lost and hopeless.
Heartache is aweful, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Even though I did the breaking up I still feel like something's been taken from my forcefully.
Hiding at my sister's atm, it's nice to not be in the house. My gran died a week ago yesterday and as it's mother's day that's hard on my mum . We're taking her to dinner later.
I really badly want to get a Nikon D60. I'm selling my F-75. I only paid £130 for it (nearly new) so I'm hoping I can get back most of what I spent if I sell it to a college student or something. It's a good camera and in good nic (I have the manual too). Once I get a digital camera I'll be able to take pictures to my hearts delight (battery pending) which will make me happier as I feel I'm losing my creativity.
I just started reading a book that my friend lent me, it's the first book I've read for about a year. I haven't found another one that's grabbed me like this one. I think I have to find books that suit the mood or stage that I'm in. This one seems to do that.
The Notebook is a film well worth watching.
If you comment be nice, I don't want any crisitism (constructive or otherwise).
